Inlove? read this please…


You know you’re inlove when….

You get them little butterfly feelings when they text you, ring you, look at you and just want to be with you….there’s lots of ways that you can feel in your heart when you are inlove. As much as being with someone and feeling you want to be with them for the rest of your life, knowing that they are the only one for you and the one that makes you feel really good about yourself there is the BIG drawback (as seen by some) in a relationship. This little thing is seen stereotypically, as the little green monster that sits on girls shoulders. JEALOUSY. It is one of the feelings that I most value and hate in a relationship.

The definition of jealousy is as follows:
1. A jealous attitude or disposition.
2. Close vigilance.

When you are in a relationship there is always a balance of this emotion between both parties. Personally I feel that girls get it more than guys, which is not a sexist remark, it is just a general feeling I see. I know a lot of people (including myself) who get jealous of another girl or friends in general of the person they are with which can lead to horrible outcomes and insecurities. Women are fragile things, like little flowers, we feel that we need to be tended to and cared for a lot of the time, which in our opinion is where the male comes in to this to make it better. When in a relationship you will find that your partner likes to make you feel good, whether it be a compliment, a look or a physical action between you both it makes the relationship a little stronger and a lot happier.
I’m sure I can say at least one person who is reading this right now cannot 100% say that they have not been visited by the little green monster when in a relationship with said partner. I think women get it more with the looks and personality of other girls mainly….how they talk to your partner and how they look appearance. Jealousy can stem back to past relationship both sexual and non-sexual, family or friend orientated as well. This then makes a girl feel insecure in herself as a person and questions may pop up such as “what if he finds her attractive” “does he think she is better than me”. Guys, if your reading this then you may think they are stupid questions but we are fragile and think the worst of everything. I can personally say that I have had this sort of thing, it’s not nice and really does cause insecure feelings upon myself.

The only thing that makes us better is the reassurance of our partner. For them to just smile and say “your being silly, I love you” or something such as “nothing is going on, I’m with you and that’s who I want” or simply “I am yours, not hers”. All these little things make us feel better, it may not make the problem go away but it sure helps us to relax and feel better about ourselves and said person we have been jealous at. We then get guilt because we know that our partner is right and would love for it not to happen and we should just accept the fact that nothing is going on and we have nothing to worry about. On the contrary from these thoughts of being okay with said person you can have more issues arise which can then lead to tense moments, arguments, fallings out, fights, divorce…..and the rest, if you catch my drift. This is another thing that can play in our heads is the fact we may think a lot into it and think they want to be with said girl because we think we are doing something wrong or have done something, Does this mean that no matter how happy we are in a relationship as a female, that our own insecurities will thus strike us to be jealous and potentially harm the relationship we have without partner?  I ask you that to think about and comment about……also how do you deal with jealousy once you get it??

 

Amy.

 

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